Have you ever had to deal with a narcissist? Are you tired of them always putting you back, making you feel miserable? Now is the time for you to clap back by learning how to make a narcissist miserable.
Who are Narcissists?
To understand how to make a narcissist miserable, we first need to understand who narcissists are and what exactly narcissism is.
The term narcissism stands for a personality trait that includes self entitlement, overly admiration of oneself, and lack of empathy.
Whereas narcissists are the people who possess the qualities of narcissism.
Before moving forward onto how to make a narcissist miserable, let’s adhere to the other side of the coin and how it works the other way around.
You might also be interested in : How to leave a toxic relationship – In depth guide.
Note : This post contains some affiliate links. Meaning, if you use these links to buy something we may earn a commission without any kind of additional cost to you.
We never recomend products that aren’t either 100% genuine, or tested personally by us.
How do Narcissists make you Miserable?
In today’s era of social media, it’s nearly impossible to escape ending up on a narcissist’s profile. Narcissists gradually come to believe in “pretty/ beauty privileges.”
They believe that their beautiful looks give them an advantage. When their photos receive a slew of likes, shares, and comments praising their attractiveness on social media, it only adds to their confidence.
In a rat race to see who is the most attractive, you may get resentful of narcissists, which is precisely what they want.
You may also begin to feel depressed and miserable as a result of the belief that they appear to be more attractive than you. Narcissists may deceive themselves into believing that only the attractive are given opportunities.
Narcissists are characterized by their inflated egos and a tendency to look down on others. They believe that they should be everyone’s first priority, and that nothing is beyond their reach.
One of the most miserable aspects of knowing a narcissist is that they will always make you feel horrible about yourself, no matter however they are.
They take pleasure in the sensation of being on top while making you feel horrible and wretched on the inside.
Grandiosity is another trait of narcissists. They think they’re superior to you because they can easily impress or impose themselves on others while you’re left in the dust. With narcissists, it’s all about retaining their position at the top.
Narcissists can be ambitious as well. Narcissists may “throw you under the bus” in order to attain their goals. Their ability to achieve their goals at whatever cost stems from the pretty privilege they believe they have.
Last but not least, narcissists are constantly looking for validation. They always want to be the center of attention. They frequently boast about even minor accomplishments.
Narcissists derive pleasure from the compliments they receive, leading them to believe that the world revolves around them.
With all of a narcissist’s characteristics, it’s easy to feel defeated while dealing with them. The rage and aggravation you experience as a result of your defeat may make you feel even more depressed, helpless, and self-conscious.
You might also be interested in : How to fix a toxic relationship – In depth guide.
How to take control away from a narcissist?
You may be surrounded by narcissistic people but be completely unaware of it. Because narcissists play with deception, it is quite simple to be dazzled by them.
Therefore, before getting curious about how to make a narcissist miserable, it’s important to understand how to spot one.
They frequently disguise themselves as someone close to you who genuinely wants the best for you. Meanwhile, they end up seeking validation by keeping you down and themselves above, making you miserable.
Now, to clear the cloud around answer on the narcissists in your life, here are some of the traits that a narcissist possesses :
- Always talk about themselves.
- Being conscious about their looks, and will often ridicule you for your style or fashion.
- They emotionally manipulate you.
- Tend to always take more credit for doing things, rather than what they deserve, that is, a sense of their entitlement.
- Are obsessed with illusions of infinite riches, power, brilliance, beauty, or perfect love.
- They make you feel bad or miserable for doing anything remotely against them.
- Don’t listen to what you want to say and often shut you down.
- They think that they know the best and display arrogant and haughty attitude or behaviour.
- Always want to be in the spotlight of attention and admiration.
How to Make a Narcissist Miserable? 12 Things They Hate
1. Beauty is not directly proportional to opportunities.
The most important part of a narcissist’s belief system is their pretty privileges. Since they believe that their beauty can get them anything, you need to prove them wrong.
Acknowledging that their beauty is not the key to every opportunity that life may throw at you is the first and foremost step in the long process of learning how to make a narcissist miserable.
They spend all the time getting their work done by charming others. Narcissists think that they will get to the end of their goals via their beauty, but it is not always so.
No person in your life should be coming in the way of the opportunities that you rightfully deserve.
When you call a narcissist out on their behavior and back it up with evidence, they despise it. They despise it even more when you do it in front of others, particularly those they are attempting to impress.
2. Start using the world “no”.
Narcissists have no idea why someone would reject them. Hearing the word ‘no’ bewilders them.
They can’t understand what’s going on in your head because they lack genuine empathy. Because they lack empathy, they do not take into consideration your feelings.
Start using the word ‘no’ to things that you are not comfortable in or feel like doing. Narcissists are accustomed to manipulating their way to their desired outcome, so using the word ‘no’ to put an end to their routine.
Since narcissists have inflated ego, a simple no can make them miserable. That’s why telling them no and sticking to your guns may elicit a strong reaction.
3. Take the control wheel back.
Narcissists use manipulating tools to get things done according to their way. They despise being told what to do. This is due to their aversion to having to answer to anyone except themselves. Seeing someone get out of their control makes them miserable.
A sense of authority other than themselves, puts them in jeopardy of fulfilling their innate needs for power and control. A narcissist is likely to become miserable if he or she is forced to answer to someone else.
4. It’s facts vs narcissists.
Narcissists utilize a lot of rambling and extravagant words to distort reality to fit their viewpoint.
They are convinced that what they believe is always correct and consciously or subconsciously recognise your emotional patterns and behavior which they use against you.
They despise it when someone confronts them with facts rather than emotions. As a result, narcissists intuitively perceive they have less of an advantage when you communicate in facts rather than using emotion.
Fighting with correct facts against the narcissist will make them miserable.
When you keep too cold, hard facts that can’t be refuted, you’re making it even more difficult to believe and prove their existence.
This is one of the best technique in order to learn How to make a narcissist miserable. Why? Because you’re giving them a problem they don’t know how to overcome.
5. Cut the attention.
Attention is the oxygen for the narcissist. They live and thrive on the attention that they receive.
As mentioned earlier, narcissists want to be the center of attention, even if it makes others around them miserable. Their lack of empathy helps them to overlook others.
To sustain their sense of inner value, they need regular approval and validation. For the same reason, narcissists even love getting negative attention.
Negative attention exacerbates their narcissistic tendencies. It encourages them to continue to prove themselves.
They can take advantage of this to enhance the trauma bond and keep you tied.As a result, a lack of recognition and attention poses a serious risk to them.
To a narcissist, nothing is more important than his or her own self-interest. When no one is paying attention to them, narcissists can’t handle it.
They have no idea how to feel significant or special unless they are the center of the universe. Therefore, a lack of attention can be your greatest tool in learning how to make a narcissist miserable.
6. Set your boundaries.
It is very important that you start to set up boundaries against the narcissist in your life.
Figuring out how to make a narcissist miserable is pointless if you’re still going to rely on them emotionally or if they play a significant role in your life. It will simply make you more miserable.
Narcissists, despise it when you set a boundary and adhere to it. They’ll test you to determine if you’re serious about what you say.
They are incapable of accepting real-life consequences. As a result, they tend to overreact to the limits set by you and use serious dialogues in order to scare you and force you to comply with them.
They are unable to recognize when they are incorrect, and they are perplexed as to why anyone would believe they are incorrect. Even if the narcissist was aware of their wrongdoings, they would be unconcerned.
It is very possible that they would react with rage when you set your boundaries.
7. Let them lose the game.
Narcissists cannot tolerate the idea of losing anything – be it a sport, a competition or a daily challenge.
So, the best way in this whole process of learning how to make a narcissist miserable is by making them lose the game against you (especially in public).
And even if they lose they might pretend that it didn’t mind them, but the reality could be polar opposite. They have a reputation for being bitter losers. They find it difficult to accept defeat and have a tendency to lash out when it occurs.
8. Public humiliation is a cherry on top.
Narcissists breathe and thrive on attention and being in the spotlight. The one and only thing that can make them the most miserable is public humiliation.
Narcissists are very vulnerable towards their public image, and humiliating that can bring them a huge deal of misery.
The egos of narcissists are extremely fragile. It jolts their existence when they believe someone is making fun of them or when they are not the considered expert or authority in a public setting. As a result, they’ll go to any length to safeguard their shaky ego.
Publicly chastising a narcissist is a surefire method to enrage them and make them miserable.
They don’t want to be portrayed in anything but the most favorable light possible. They will dislike the scenario if you embarrass them in any way. In fact, you should brace yourself for the possibility of being ignored by the narcissist following the public humiliation.
9. Stop the narcissist’s deception.
The narcissists’ are masters in the art of deception. They might claim to have empathy when they genuinely don’t have it. To keep you under their control, they can go to great lengths to deceive you. This is because losing control over you might make them miserable.
To get admission into your weakness, narcissists exploit cognitive empathy. False kindness and compassion are used to create a sense of trust and reputation.
So, clearing out the cloud of deception around you will make them miserable, as they will lose the game that they have by their means mastered.
Narcissists despise vulnerability and emotional expression at the same time. It is viewed as a sign of weakness by them. Yet, on the other hand, they may use manipulative and subtle practices of cognitive empathy against you.
10. Make the narcissist commit to their dreamy promises.
Narcissists hate the idea of commiting. They might have dreamy illusions, think and speak very high of themselves.
Although they will surely fail in sticking to those ideals, as it will be far from what lies in reality. Therefore they might bend and break the criteria of judgment when it comes to them.
Although they believe they are entitled to all forms of loyalty, they rarely show it. They also don’t want you to leave their life since it implies that they’ve failed or lost control in some way.
You’ll make them miserable if you offer them an ultimatum and push them to commit.
11. You have to let go.
Losing people from their lives makes the narcissists miserable, because they have very few of them. They have a hard time getting along with those who don’t share their distorted and dreamy vision.
As a result, they are unable to tolerate people who are grounded in reality. If narcissists are presented with anything that contradicts their god-like status, their reaction will be vicious and make you hate them.
12. Clear your own views.
Anything you do might not help you achieve your goal unless you are clear with your views on the narcissist. The narcissist hates the notion that you might recall your life before meeting them.
This is their greatest fear, and they’ll use a variety of deception tactics to keep it from happening. Therefore it is very important that you keep your head straight and thoughts clear, to prevent yourself from falling into their deceptions.
The ultimate decision lies on you – whether you want to keep them as a part of your lives or not.
13. Rain, rain go away.
If you’re hell bent on figuring out how to make a narcissist miserable, then the best thing to is leave them for good.
When you choose yourself above the narcissist and leave the relationship for good, you are effectively demonstrating to them that you are no longer under their control.
The ultimate method to humiliate, outsmart, and overcome a narcissist is to leave them.
The greatest method to get even with a narcissist is to go away and live your life according to your own free will.
13. Reaching out for help is important.
It is important to know when you need help and not hesitate to reach out to ask for it.
You should definitely consider going to therapy in order to get your inner self at peace, deal with your unchecked traums and walk towards a better as well as brighter tomorrow.
I’m not saying you certainly need a therapist to get over a narcissists deception but giving one a small visit doesn’t sound so bad either, especially when you can do so from the ease of your home.
- You will get a qualified personal therapist will be by your side – from start to finish.
- Sections that include all the information and necessary tools to identify, challenge and overcome your problems.
- Worksheets – In each worksheet you will have to answer a few questions related to the problems you face and in return you’ll get tips from your therapist on a daily basis according to those answers.
Daily journal, activity plan, Weekly live sessions, yoga sessions, the right to message your therapist at any time of the day and more.
It is a cost effective, do-it-yourself, therapist-guided alternative or supplement to counseling via downloadable products.
If you’re someone who doesn’t prefer therapy, then you can try Therapy-At-Home Workbook by love and life tool box.
It is a cost effective, do-it-yourself, therapist-guided alternative of traditional therapy in the form of downloadable products.
Conclusion : How to make a narcissist miserable?
Learning how to make a narcissist miserable might not be a difficult task but putting the action in plan sure is. They probably will give you the cold shoulder and try to make you apologize for whatever you are doing.
While on the other hand, they never consider the possibility of them doing something wrong or the need of apologizing to you.
The range of their outburst against you may sometimes become unhealthy and problematic. Therefore, you should be utmost careful and also be responsible for your own mental sanity as you deal with the narcissists.
You should also prepare for their reactions, before you move forward with your plan to make them miserable.
The sure shot way to shut down a narcissist is by telling them No. Using words like — No, I’ll not, Don’t, and stop while dealing with a narcissist and standing on your ground no matter how manipulative they get is the best way to achieve your goal of shuting such people down.
The best way to get revenge on a narcissist would be to not do anything at all. Just walk away and cut all ties with them be it physical, emotional or mental. At the end of the day, your mental peace and prosperity should always be your first priority.
Some of the common things that triggers a narcissistic rage are : When you take the spot light away from them, when you hold them accountable for their actions, Critisism, even the constructive one and ofcourse when their manipulative tactics are exposed in front of the public.
Thank you for sticking with me till the very end.